Sweet Pea

It has been a rough week, month, and year here in the McBride household.  Some of you may know, and some of you probably don't, but when we found out we were pregnant with Oliver it was quite a surprise.  We prayed about it a lot, and were given comfort and joy in knowing that whether it was in our time frame or not, we needed to begin our family.  That joy only increased in the next few months of the pregnancy as we anticipated bringing our little boy home and raising him to be a wonderful man (just like his dad :)).  Unfortunately we had our little boy too early and he passed away.  This trial brought many tears and so much sadness, but it also brought immeasurable blessings and joy in knowing this separation was only temporary and that we would see our sweet Ollie again soon.
After much prayer we felt that we should still be trying to begin our little family.  Since Olivers birth we have unsuccessfully tried for 10 whole months.  I was finally accepting that we once again we needed to be trusting with the Lords time frame and not ours, when we found out we were pregnant again this month. 
You cannot imagine the JOY and excitement.
Sadly we only made it 6 weeks 5 days before we found out we were miscarrying this past Thurs. Oct.13th.  We spent most of the weekend in tears, on the phone with the Dr., or in the hospital getting shots and my blood drawn.  We had to find a new Dr. with this pregnancy because of insurance, and we just love him.  He has been so honest, kind, and understanding.  We have another appointment with him this Thurs. because he wants to talk to us about our previous losses, and where we go from here. 
This loss has been especially hard.  I don't claim to understand the Lords plan for our lives or our family, in fact I don't know if anybody has ever been more clueless than me.  All I know is over the past year, and most recently over these past 5 days, I have felt more peace and comfort than I ever could have hoped for.  I know the Lord loves us, and I know he weeps with us. 
I know that we will be able to have children. 
I also have no doubt that we will once again see this sweet baby and be able to have him/her in our family.  We have great motivation to live our lives in such a way that we can be with our children again.
Not very many people knew about this recent loss, and we hadn't told anyone about the pregnancy.  To those AMAZING family and friends that are hearing about this for the first time here (which is pretty much everybody), I sincerely hope you're not offended.  I'm sorry you have to hear about it this way.  If any of you have ever been through something similar (I'm so sorry if you have) you may better understand our reasons for telling people this way.  It's not any easy subject to bring up, and when you're finally able to bring it up there's this awkward interaction that usually takes place where the other person has no idea what to say, and so they just end up saying I'm sorry about 10 times, and asking if there's anything they can do.  I don't know that I would know what to say in that situation either, but it generally just makes everything awkward and uncomfortable for the both of us.
However, I don't mind talking about the miscarriage, I am very open about everything with Oliver, and the same goes for this sweet pea, talking actually helps me deal with it I think.  So if you see us you're more than welcome to give us a hug (please do, I love hugs), and say sorry, I might cry a little, sorry if I do :).  Sadly there's not much you can do for us (unless of course, you know how to make a baby stick inside my uterus for the whole 40 weeks, then let's talk), but we appreciate prayers, and all the love you give us. 
We love you all so much.
Seriously, we could not ask for better family and friends than you.
Thank you for letting us break the news this way, it's just easier.

To Oliver and our sweet pea, we love you more than words could express, and can't wait to see you soon :).